Reflection 7

After reading Antonio Iparralde's October 5th reflection on the failure of the state in Somalia, I was inspired. By Antonio's count, there are at least five separatist regions in the country, which together compromise a significant portion of Somalia's land area: Somaliland, Puntland, Galmudug, Maakhir, and and Northland. Sudan's two simultaneous civil wars pale in comparison to the armed Somalian free-for-all: although vague and sometimes shifting alliances form between the separatist groups, the Federal Transitional Government, the reconstituted Islamic Courts Union, Ethiopia, Eritrea, and various world powers, the factions battling in Somalia seem innumerable.

Secession movements are nothing new in Somalia, so why not start one of our own? Professor Jackson's World Politics learning community could quickly emerge as a major force in Somalian power politics. Think about it: the total cost of one year's tuition, room and board, and assorted fees at American University is $49,441, according to the American University admissions web site. Less any financial aid, the average out-of-pocket cost is still probably in the neighborhood of $30,000 a year. If all twenty-one University College students were to drop out of school and establish our own state in Somalia, and Professor Jackson were to reroute some of the University College programming money to us, we'd have an annual budget of over $600,000 a year. According to Wikipedia (I know, I know, not a reliable source, but maybe if we didn't have a World Politics midterm due today at 5:00 pm I'd have a little more time to do research) the purchasing power parity GDP per capita in Somalia was $600 a year in 2007. Paying twice the prevailing wage, we could hire an army of around 500 soldiers - plenty to defend a small emirate or constitutional monarchy.

I'm still working out a few details on the precise form of our soon-to-be-formed emirate/kingdom/jingoistic republic, but there are a few things that seem obvious. The state would naturally take on the name BroTopia, and the national anthem would be Soccer Practice by Johnny McGovern. Patrick Thaddeus Jackson would be eternal president and head of state, a largely ceremonial post but one which could significantly boost his name recognition via appearances on 90-foot tall Soviet-style posters. As the founder of BroTopia, I am only the logical choice for head of government (prime minister, because I'm leaning toward a parliamentary system of government). A few other people have already called spots in the BroTopian political system, or just seem to naturally merit them. If you want to reserve a spot, just comment with your request.

Eternal President: ProfPTJ

Prime Minister: Myself

Minister of Kicking Ass:

Minister of Taking Names: Seamus McGregor

Minister of Making Friends: Rachel

Minister of Holding Hands: AngelDust

Minister of METAL:

Minister of Propaganda:

Minister of Abstract Nouns:

Opposition Leaders:

Parliamentarian: Jacquelyn

Just A Private Citizen and Definitely Not the Chief of The Secret Police: Antonio Iparralde